unfollowryanross:

if you ever feel bad about yourself, just remember this one time in my english class, we were writing horror stories and one of the girls wrote “it was friday the 13th, the night before halloween” for her opening sentence

theheartofachiefsoulofadragon:

monobeartheater:

chief-blue-meanie:

chief-blue-meanie:

“I keep rearranging the letters of my sisters The Beatles sign on her bedroom door.

She is not happy.” 

I’ve given up trying to make them normal.

imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage

ok and now there’s another one

image

i didnt know the beatles could become so many words

Eh seatbelt

smilingslowly:

spookywhiteghost:

fuckinglesbian:

princessnausicaa:

my mom tried to teach our goats to pee in one certain spot by giving them treats when they’d pee in that spot

except that

they think that now whenever they pee they get a treat

so whenever they see my mom

they pee

 laughed for a solid five minutes

behaviorism gone wrong

Pavlov is laughing in his grave

megamintcat:

ryansealcrest:

does it come with butter pillows

is anyone reading that description 

megamintcat:

ryansealcrest:

does it come with butter pillows

is anyone reading that description 

starfighting:

do you ever see a character that’s worshipped by a fandom and go “you’re not that great”

evodevolover:

bettervillains:

fuckmenaya:

connorkawaii:

connorkawaii:

three words. just those these special words. and ill be yours forever.

free video games

I have food

free overnight shipping

orphan black marathon

"Claiming there is no other life in the universe is like scooping up some water, looking at the cup and claiming there are no whales in the ocean."
Neil deGrasse Tyson in response to “Aliens can’t exist because we haven’t found them yet”  (via hersapphicgoddess)

I never want to be called the funniest Indian female comedian that exists. I feel like I can go head-to-head with the best white, male comedy writers that are out there. Why would I want to self-categorize myself into a smaller group than I’m able to compete in?

I never want to be called the funniest Indian female comedian that exists. I feel like I can go head-to-head with the best white, male comedy writers that are out there. Why would I want to self-categorize myself into a smaller group than I’m able to compete in?

She likes me, I know she likes me. And I like her, but I can’t let her know that. If I do then it means it’s really over with you and I’m not sure I want that. What am I talking about? I do want that. I’m just afraid that I won’t ever feel this way about anyone ever again. I like this feeling. I like smiling whenever I think of you, I like how we are, I like how we act, I like how much I love you. But I have to let you go because it’s never going to be more than this. And I can’t continue to waste all this love for you.

I have to stop friendzoning people way too fast.

swordbrush:

I really like drawing little black girls

swordbrush:

I really like drawing little black girls

loserchildhotpants:

marinashutup:

one time sophomore year this girl told a boy that she couldn’t go swimming because she was on her period and didn’t have a tampon and he said “can’t you just hold it” and this is why we need better sex education

OH GOD